Today is New Years Eve. I am excited as I get to spend it with my boyfriend and best friends. With all the people I have talked to today, most have stated that they think this year is going to be even better than the last and that it's going to be a good year for them and they all seem to look forward to it. Me, on the other hand, I am somewhat dreading the New Year. God has me in a season where I am attending school and all I can think of is how stressful the new year is going to be. I'll be doing an internship, which I have never done before and I have to complete what seems like massive amounts of paperwork and I am not entirely sure how to complete the paperwork when I look at it. Some of them are easy, but others not so much. I am also to do a weekly journal and I have no idea what that's going to look like. Two of my days are going to be 12 hour days 8-8 and in reality add 2 hours to that for travel time. I think to myself "How am I going to do this, and still remain sane?" Last quarter was stressful enough! All I can ask for is God's grace in these moments and humble myself. I know that I cannot do this on my own, even though I know I am going to try to because that's how I tend to be in situations like this that seem to me to have a lot of control factors that I will want and feel the need to control. Thankfully I will have my friends, family, and boyfriend to level me out! Please pray for me as I start the new year. I love God so much, and I need his help and knowing my sinful ways, I will try to do this on my own. Pray that acquire the attitude of humility and forfeit my pride through the new year.
One my leaders of my small group gave me this book Humility: True Greatness by C. J. Mahaney. In it he writes "Pride is when sinful human beings aspire to the status and position of God and refuse to acknowledge their dependence upon Him." When you define pride in this way, man oh man, it puts into perspective what exactly you are doing when you are being prideful. This really helps to see how infectious pride can be. It is the first sin and the root of probably every sin that we commit. What's the "cure" for pride? Humility, of course, the most obvious answer! But having true humility and knowing that you are nothing without God, He gives us grace. I have learned that it is this state of humility that God gives us his grace and can transform our hearts!! Amazing grace! I love God so much and I can't wait for him to show me more ways to be humble and how to live it truly. Because right now, pride is not doing me much good other than making stressed! I pray that you too can explore in your heart where pride exists and become humble before the Lord. It is only then can we achieve true greatness in his eyes! I pray for everyone to have their eyes open to this concept, if they already are not, and just a continuance of God's grace and purification of your heart and mine! Praise the Lord!
Tomorrow, Branden and I leave for Atlanta, Georgia for the Passion Conference. I have never been before and feel excited and unsure at the same to go. Mostly excited though. It took me awhile to get to the point of excitement, but I know that God will show up and will do amazing things through me and in me, and also for others. That, in itself, will be exciting. To see what he is doing in others around the world that are my age. It will be great to see! Please pray for safe travels and God's manifested presence in others at the conference and also for Branden and I. We need the Lord so much and I can't wait for him to transform us even more! There will be lots of crying, which I am not looking forward too, but oh well!
I wish everyone a Happy New Year, actually I pray that everyone in the New Year will receive Joy and Peace from our Lord Jesus Christ!
God bless!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
For Starters
So, I had this thought several months ago of creating a Christian blog, where what would be discussed is just someone's walk with the Lord and their daily struggles. At the time, I didn't feel like I was supposed to have one, and even now I am not sure. I decided to create this on a whim today, but the thought of creating one has been on my mind periodically for some time. My title "Diaries of a Runner" came to me while I was running and because God has shown and talked to me so much on my runs. I remember thinking to myself "That is such an awesome idea" and at the moment I felt pretty passionate about it! If you don't know me well and you are reading this, you will find that I try to be pretty open and vulnerable with what I go through, but at the same time I mind other's and my privacy.
Currently, God has been bringing up a lot in my life, although I have not been directly dealing with it through Him. Lately, He's been highlighting my selfishness and pride that get in the way of my relationships and loving others. It's been really hard to let some of this stuff go, but I know He will take care of me and be there always as long as I reach out to him.
Just the past Tuesday, I was going on my daily run and, as I was running I got to have the rare experience of running in the snow. This was really neat as I have never ran in the snow. As I was running, I was thinking what was going on in my life and my thoughts are almost always geared toward God. However, I started to notice that snowflakes would ever so often just fall into my mouth (I have a tendency to breathe my mouth slightly open when I run). Somehow this started leading to more thoughts about snowflakes and God. First I thought about how as a child, we often tend to open our mouths and try to catch every single snowflake and delight in catching them. As adults, this no longer happens and we don't take as much delight in the snow or catching falling snowflakes. I also thought about how rare snowflakes are and how special and precious they are; each are like little gifts or blessings. When thinking about this in relating it to God, I felt He was showing me that He is always throwing blessings and gifts our way. They could be as subtle as words of encouragement, comfort, words of wisdom or as tangible as an unexpected check in the mail, an answered prayer. As children, we are so willing to receive what God has to give us that we stand trying to catch everyone He throws our way, we want Him and what He has for us so much. But, sometimes, as we become older, we take advantage of the snowflakes and maybe even ignore them. Every once in awhile the just show up in our lives and we consume it, but then ignore them again. I really felt that God was showing me that He wants to give us rare unique, and precious gifts and blessings like snowflakes and that we should be waiting like children to catch them as the fall down to us and eager to accept them.
I pray for you my friend that you will stand and wait to catch the snowflakes that come your way!
In Christ's Love,
Kara
Currently, God has been bringing up a lot in my life, although I have not been directly dealing with it through Him. Lately, He's been highlighting my selfishness and pride that get in the way of my relationships and loving others. It's been really hard to let some of this stuff go, but I know He will take care of me and be there always as long as I reach out to him.
Just the past Tuesday, I was going on my daily run and, as I was running I got to have the rare experience of running in the snow. This was really neat as I have never ran in the snow. As I was running, I was thinking what was going on in my life and my thoughts are almost always geared toward God. However, I started to notice that snowflakes would ever so often just fall into my mouth (I have a tendency to breathe my mouth slightly open when I run). Somehow this started leading to more thoughts about snowflakes and God. First I thought about how as a child, we often tend to open our mouths and try to catch every single snowflake and delight in catching them. As adults, this no longer happens and we don't take as much delight in the snow or catching falling snowflakes. I also thought about how rare snowflakes are and how special and precious they are; each are like little gifts or blessings. When thinking about this in relating it to God, I felt He was showing me that He is always throwing blessings and gifts our way. They could be as subtle as words of encouragement, comfort, words of wisdom or as tangible as an unexpected check in the mail, an answered prayer. As children, we are so willing to receive what God has to give us that we stand trying to catch everyone He throws our way, we want Him and what He has for us so much. But, sometimes, as we become older, we take advantage of the snowflakes and maybe even ignore them. Every once in awhile the just show up in our lives and we consume it, but then ignore them again. I really felt that God was showing me that He wants to give us rare unique, and precious gifts and blessings like snowflakes and that we should be waiting like children to catch them as the fall down to us and eager to accept them.
I pray for you my friend that you will stand and wait to catch the snowflakes that come your way!
In Christ's Love,
Kara
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